Lost my marbles

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I  lost my marbles this year.

My husband died after seven years of fighting a rare disease that was similar to Multiple Sclerosis.  Still, it came as a shock when I found him that morning not breathing.  The paramedics came and were not able to revive him.  I cried.  Everyone was very kind.  My neighbor, Laurie, came over to help while the medical examiner came and finally the undertakers.   They let me have a few minutes alone with him before they took him.  I cried while I held him. I cried while I touched and caressed his face.  But, looking at him I realized that he looked more well and more at peace than he had in years. It was so hard for us both the past few years because he couldn’t walk or stand and had trouble even sitting up.  Also, he had lost his hearing.  Still, I’d take it all back just to have my Manny with me.

Then, for a number of reasons, I had to move.  Packing and getting rid of things is not my forte, so, my friend, Sue,  and my son helped me.  Sue came over several times a week and bravely sorted through my decades of accumulated treasures and junk.   I don’t know how I would have downsized without her.  As we were packing, we came across my marble collections.  Gathered in different boxes and tins, there were several hundreds.  I had cat’s eyes, comets, clearies, tri-lites, and many others.  Below are more types with their names.

She was impressed by my collection and thought they were beautiful and so, she carefully packed them in a box.  I was so relieved that she didn’t see them as silly or want me to get rid of them.  But, then my son came home for a weekend to help me pack.  He thought that I hadn’t downsized enough and looked in some boxes that Sue and I had packed to see if there was anything that I should be getting rid of.  And then he came across the marbles.

“What are these for? You don’t need marbles, you don’t play with them.” He said while he quickly took them out of the packed box.

“I..I collect them.  They are pretty.” I anxiously replied.

Although a great son (and an incredible help during this difficult time), he saw no need for an adult woman to have marbles and so off they went to the thrift store.  And that’s how I literally lost my marbles. I miss my marbles.  They sparkled and glowed in the light and felt cool and smooth to the touch. I liked the feeling of rolling them around in my hands. But it’s nothing compared with losing  my Manny.

Soon after, I figuratively lost my marbles and ended up in the psych ward of a hospital.  But that is another story.

Yes

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The author of this blog took the time to give me a much needed pep talk after I commented on this quote. I like the self-image of warrior so much better than survivor. It is a more true representation of those of us that fight to function despite our mental battles. Much gratitude and thanks to Pattyspathtohealing.

Becoming a Warrior Queen

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Out Of The Mouths Of Babes…

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For everyone who has ever been loved by a dog.

Sunshinebright

A shared article on my Facebook page touched me so deeply, that I had to share it with my WordPress readers:

A Dog’s Purpose?
(according to a 6-year-old).

Boy with Wolfhound

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog’s owners, Ron, his wife Lisa , and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn’t do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker ‘s…

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Favorite Childhood Books

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One of my favorites was The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.  This was in the late 60’s before it became so popular or was made into movies.   I remember first finding it in my grade school library.  I would peruse shelves of books, just looking at titles and covers one by one. Suddenly, I stopped.  I saw a picture of a dwarf holding a flask (older copy of book).  Hmmm.. this looks interesting…I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up as my excitement built.   I took hold of the book feeling it’s promise in my hands.   I think this is the best way to find a book — to feel it calling you.  And to find it on your own — not on a best seller list, or as a present. It seems more personal, as if it is a secret shared between you and the author.

I’d like to hear about other people’s favorite childhood books, so please write in the comment box if you feel like sharing.

Houdini’s Song

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In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Always Something There to Remind Me.”

 Houdini’s Song

I saw the wind blow white dandelion fluff today

and remembered you.

Running, prancing, and patrolling your yard —

Long ears flapping, plumed tail flowing.

Oh, how I miss your freckled face —

Your kind brown eyes

and velvet nose.

Sigh.

There will never be another dog just like you.

I sure miss a friend like Hoo.