A Perfect Afternoon

Quote

A Perfect Afternoon

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Singin’ in the Rain.”

The rain has been persistent all day. It’s been dreary inside and out this morning, but I have finished all the chores and it is only one o’ clock.  I turn on the lamp by my overstuffed reading chair now.  It casts light on the window panes behind it. The rain is trickling down them.  A whole afternoon to myself.  Free to do anything I want.  I start by putting a record of Debussy’s music on the stereo. The Prelude to the Afternoon of a Faun fills the room that is lined with books. Then,  to the fireplace.  Kneeling down on the hearth, I place a log and some kindling inside.  After opening the damper, I light the kindling and watch the bright flames flicker. My cheeks redden and warm from the heat.  The room has transformed from dreary to cozy. The light from the fire glows in the cut glass of the decanters on an old table.  “What a good idea.” I think and pour myself a sherry.  Grabbing my latest mystery novel, I sink into the chair and sip the sweet wine. Dinah, my tortoise shell cat, pads into the room and throws herself down on the braided rug in front of the fireplace. I sit, well content, and listen to the music.  After the last piece on the album has played, the silence and the sounds of the rain are all I want.  And, I have taken the precaution of taking the phone off the hook.  Neither the cat, nor I, will be disturbed on this fine, rainy afternoon.

Our Inner Dragons

Standard

Okay, so I am not yet the poster child for mental health.  But I  and my therapist have slayed a few of my inner dragons during my oh-so-many years of therapy. I used to feel dirty to put it mildly. Being around my therapist made me feel ashamed because I felt so disgusting.  I didn’t understand how he could be in the same room as me.  He seemed so clean and lovely while I was something hideous.  I would cringe from my shame. But now, I feel clean too.  That was a huge dragon.

I used to feel that the abuse was somehow my fault. The guilt was toxic. Now that’s no longer an issue.  They did wrong, I was just a child. And not just a child — but a lovely, beautiful good child.  Another dragon slain.

I need to remember these battles fought and won as I grow weary from my latest battles.  I am in a difficult place right now. I am surrounded by fears.  Fears of leaving the house, fears of the future, and fear that I will get no better and never be released from depression and anxiety.  But these are just new dragons. Dragons do not go down in battle easily or even in one battle.

And so, I will take up the sword of hope. I will remember won battles.  And dragons lying in smoldering heaps.

Things that make us happy…

Standard

Source: Things that make us happy…

I thought this an important post for sufferers of PTSD since bad memories often plague us.  To challenge ourselves to have a cache of good memories and sweet moments too would be healing and helpful. One memory that comes to my mind is a few hours spent at a quiet beach with my adult son sitting on the warm sand  just soaking up the bright sun, listening to the waves pulsing, and collecting small shells.  I am going through tough times right now and feel that my life is just awful.  But my life is not just about now, or the  parts of the past that were terrible. It has included good times too.  Even great times.  That time at the beach was less than a year ago.  I am going to find a pretty tin or handsome box and then write about wonderful times on slips of paper and put them inside. My story is about more than abuse, more than trauma.  I just need some help remembering that.  I hope you have many sweet times to put in your memory box should you decide to keep one too.

Please click on the above site for more ideas to uplift your life.

Image from Bing

Journaling by Hand

Quote

Journaling by Hand

 I write everyday in a journal.  In it I hand write my daily thoughts, feelings and dreams. There is something therapeutic about taking pen to paper.  Your emotions flow out in the ink.  I write so that I can think clearly.  I write so that my actions and choices are not mere reactions to life and people. Instead, I can live with premeditation and make choices about how I will react.  My thinking can get all muddled in an unruly pile.  I take each thought from the pile and put it on paper and begin to see what I really think or feel.  More often than not I can see solutions where before there were only problems.  Or if I am ruminating endlessly on some incident or interaction that is bothering me, I write it out.  It gets that hamster off the wheel!  Then, I can get on with my life.  Don’t know what’s bothering you?  Start writing and you’ll be illuminated. You think maybe the people in your life are not listening to you well?  Tell it to paper. It is endlessly patient.  Need to just complain?  You won’t bore anyone and can kvetch till your pen runs dry.  I try to encourage everyone I know to journal. Try it, you’ll like it.

My Harshest Critic

Standard

I am my harshest critic.  I have compassion for other people but have to work at having compassion for myself.  One thing I do that seems to help is to imagine that I am a character in a book. I view my life page by page and  begin to see someone that deserves empathy and shouldn’t be judged too harshly.  Perhaps you too are hard on yourself. Try this exercise and imagine you are a fictional character.  We all could use a little less judgement and a little more self-compassion.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery’s The Little Prince

Standard

This is my favorite quote from one of my favorite books.

“…what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

It is the only quote that I have memorized and I will sprinkle it within a conversation any chance I get. Especially to children as they will be more likely to ask what I mean by the quote. They are intrigued by anything invisible.  But what does essential mean? Then I tell them that what is important is invisible to the eye. Usually this leads to a minute of quiet reflection on their part as they ponder the little prince’s words.

I also quote it to myself when I feel the stirrings of consumerism leaching into my heart.

Do you remember?

We need children to teach us or reteach us important things we have forgotten.

If you have somehow missed reading this wise and wonderful book, do yourself a favor and get yourself a copy today and read it.