It isn’t ‘popular’ to admit you are fragile. Abuse survivors are expected to be ‘strong’ all the time. In fact, we are expected to be stronger than those who have not endured much suffering. Which is bizarre in itself. I have come to realise, we live in a very emotionally invalidating and abandoning society. […]
This post spoke to me as I sometimes too refer to myself as fragile. Sometimes, it is because I have been triggered; at other times, it seems that my protective barrier is down. When my fragility is caused by the second — that my protective force field is down — is when I feel the most authentic. I feel the air on my skin and my history in my bones. But the history is combined with years of healing so it is not jarring or very painful. I feel more alive at these times with a keen sense of myself and the many years I have lived. And on these days I am gentle with myself and stay home. Rather than chide myself for this sense of fragility, I celebrate it. Because like the Velveteen Rabbit, it is when I am most real.