Weepy Day

Standard

I am having a weepy day today.  You name it — I have cried over it.  It started this morning after waking from a bad dream.  You know the kind — the kind that seems realer than reality.  The experts say crying is supposed to be good for you.  But I don’t like it.   I find it frightening and fear it leading to a mental meltdown.  From silent tears to sobbing to practically keening and wailing, I have a whole repertoire.  Did it do me any good?  My best guess is maybe.  I didn’t numb out today.  I did finally function and get washed and dressed.  I washed the kitchen floor, swept the stairs and started a load of laundry.  But, when Onyx sat on my lap and purred  I started crying again because he was being so sweet.   Thankfully no one is home (but the cats) to see this spectacle that I am making of myself today.

I feel a bit calmer now.  Not so raw.  Perhaps, the cup of tea helped. 🙂  The storm has finally passed. Have you had a weepy, sad day recently?  Did you find crying helped?  Please feel free to share your thoughts.

 

 

 

A Faith I Can Embrace

Image

I found this quote in a post by Fortafy on Facebook:

“Humanity should be our race; Love should be our religion.”

It was the caption below a photo of two children of different races and religions.  The simplicity of the thought struck me.  This was a faith I could embrace. The past year has seen my faith in the religion I was raised dwindle to the point of fearing that there is no god.   I say fearing because the god I believed in was compassionate, loving, just and caring.  I saw him as the good father I never had. Losing my faith has meant losing my loving father figure.  Losing someone who loved me and who could help me.  I haven’t made any final decisions yet.  Who am I to decide whether there is a god or not? But if there is, I believe he is capable of accepting my doubt without punishment.  But, all this has left a void in my soul.   What did I believe?  What would give my life meaning? How should I live out my remaining days?  And so, this quote spoke to me.  It says simply to love.   And to love each human.   I don’t have the audacity to think that I can do this perfectly; but, it could be my aim, my goal.  Its a sort of religion, but one without infidels or a hell for unbelievers.  At any rate, it is a path.  A path I can follow as I venture into this new year.